A woman goes to the doctor, beaten black and blue. The Doctor asks: "What happened?"
The woman says: "Doctor, I don't know what to do. Every time my husband comes home drunk he beats me to a pulp."
The Doctor says: "I have a real good cure for that. When your husband comes home drunk, just take a glass of sweet tea and start swishing...
A mouse looked through the crack in the wall to see the farmer and his wife open a package. What food might this contain?' The mouse wondered - he was devastated to discover it was a mousetrap. retreating to the farmyard, the mouse proclaimed the warning:
There is a mousetrap in the house! There is a mousetrap in the house!' The chicken clucked and scratched, raised her head and said, ' Mr. Mouse, I can tell this is a grave concern to you, but it is of no consequence to me.